By Kim Gebo
Vulnerable: susceptible to physical or emotional harm - “Merriam Webster”
Have you experienced vulnerability?
The question reads: why is it we feel most vulnerable when we are being our true selves?
Have you ever taken the time to reflect and wonder why this is? Have we learned from past experiences that our true self gets attention we aren’t looking for? Have you put on a cloak to cover vulnerability? Worn it for so long that it has become a part of you? Maybe it has become your shield and you wear it proud like and actor on stage playing your part. However, your part in the play doesn’t get rave reviews because you aren’t shining like they say you should. What could be missing? Deep inside is a pang. A feeling. Something is there. It has been tucked away in a small box for so long you have forgotten. Who are you? You may ask: who am I? For so long you have been the actor that everyone has wanted you to be. Playing the part exactly as you should, right on queue. Never missing a show. Not wanting to disappoint a single person. It has worked too. Clear sailing until now. What has changed?
You asked the question out loud. Who am I? A stirring deep inside makes you shift. The activities you have always looked forward to now seem dull. You too feel dull, weighted, you feel like you are forgetting something.
Real: actually existing or happening: not imaginary
: not fake, false, or artificial
: important and deserving to be regarded or treated in a serious way
Cob-webs have been brushed aside, the cover on the box has been opened. You catch a reflection of yourself in the mirror and you are smiling. Where did that come from you say out loud. Today you feel lighter in your step. Dull has left you today. Inspiration fills you and you want to bake. Bake? The last time you baked something you were visiting your grandparent’s home. There is a dinner party tonight you are attending and you promised to bring the dessert. You find a recipe for pie you know will be perfect because you can get the berries at the Farmer’s Market. Even the crust will be made by you. You got this! Ingredients – check, recipe – check, enough time to create your magic – check. The pie is in the oven and you have no idea where the past 2 hours have gone. It only felt like 20 minutes. It isn’t as pretty as the picture on the recipe page but you don’t care. Whoah, another where did that come from plays in your head. That makes twice today. You realize you have done something you wanted to do today. Not something you were supposed to do or have done every Saturday for the past 15 years, but something totally out of the ordinary. You enjoyed it too. A part of you is in that pie and you get it. You put YOU into the creation. Into what you will share with your friends. You have brought Vulnerable back and said: “I got you” because you want to be Real. No longer are the days of not shining. Your light has just been turned back on. Get out there and share it with others! We could all use some light.